Floyd Hates us All

This is Floyd. Floyd is a former co-worker of mine who was the original basis for Geeks With Color, and our overall plight. He was a little bit Country, a little bit Rock N Roll, and all the way crazy.
Never have I met someone so hell-bent on deprecating himself to the lowest degree. The kid had problems, and when he wasn’t telling everyone within earshot how he’d move to Afrika for the economy, he was rambling on about wanting to pull a Columbine at our job. That boy wasn’t right.

He was a disgusting creature who never shaved his nose hairs and went around looking like a wild Banshee who hasn’t eaten in eight days. He showed everyone those disgusting videos you find on the internets, and then he’d laugh about them. Then he’d proceed to say racist things, all the while creaming in his shorts over this gorgeous Kenyan girl we worked with.

I know everyone has THAT co-worker. But this guy was something else. When he wasn’t going on about how Sonic the Hedgehog was the greatest video game of all time, he was trying to push a defunct comic book on us: Lady Death. The kid was so ridiculous that my friend Justin and I created fake bingo cards out of his catch phrases that he’d say all day every day. Things like “Moving to Kenya,” “Sonic,” and “I’m gonna go home and drink whiskey and jerk off” were all on these cards that we’d pass out to the rest of the gaggle of people he tortured. It was indeed fun at the office.

It all came to a screeching halt the day we decided to just mess with the kid by staring at him, then laughing like loonies when he’d catch us. This went on throughout most of the day, and by the end of the shift it made him cry. Then he got defensive and he wanted to punch Justin. That’s when Justin threatened him by saying he’d knock him into next Tuesday if he didn’t stop. He did.

That’s when we realized that Floyd hates us all.

We knew that we could no longer mess with him during office hours. Nope. The days of us paying him back for all the crap he’d put us through were over, and we’d have to come up with new and more creative ways to exact our revenge. After bouncing around several ideas we finally decided on floydhatesusall.com I got to work immediately on the website, and its content. While it wouldn’t exactly be a slam book, it would be most unkind to him to say the least.

Please don’t feel sorry for him. He did terrible things which included coming up to us individually and telling us that he shaved his balls that day. He did that and jerked off frequently in the bathroom. When he wasn’t doing that he was covering the bathroom walls with his feces. This was not a nice kid.

So after working on the site for a bit I decided that we needed much more than quirky anecdotes about his mother and father being related. Thus, the site evolved into talking about video games, wrestling, sports, food, movies, and comic books. He never knew about the site, even though we told him about it often. He thought we were lying. We were not.

Floyd eventually quit, and little by little my friends left as well. It was like that scene in Life where Eddie Murphy and Martin’s prison mates wither away one by one as times passes on.

In the end I was left with a website and an idea. The website was eventually killed for lack of ideas and creative support. I thought and thought and thought, and eventually thought I could do it again with a little money thrown into it the site could look awesome instead of what looks like a leftover WBS member page from 1997. I needed a name and a new concept.

I was a geek. A Mexican-American geek with no real outlet to go and write what I felt in a field dominated by non minorities. I was pretty militant at the time, and I had gotten sick of going onto message boards and chat rooms and hearing racist things, and having to put up with members defending it because to them it didn’t seem racist at all. Thus, Geeks With Color was born.Before the site could go live some stuff happened and I lost contact with the web designer. Months then years passed. GWC was dead. I was always a fan of podcasts, and I had listened to several gaming shows at the time. Most notably, Gamertag Radio, Uncle Gamer, Achievement Junkies, and 1up Yours. That’s when I decided to do my own. So I grabbed my friend Q, whom I had known from such amiable communities like Add a Writer and a Dallas Cowboys discussion board, and we started the Geeks With Color Podcast. So far it has been a fun ride!

All thanks go to Floyd and his disgusting habits. If not for you I would have never thought to pick up a microphone and blather incessantly. Hats off.